What is the most life-altering experience you have had?
Last year, my mother died. Nursing her through her last weeks of life was the most life altering experience I’ve ever had.
What did you learn about yourself after this experience?
I learned that I am stronger than I could ever have imagined. When you live through a loss that big, who you are in the world shifts. Things you once took seriously become laughable and suddenly things you took for granted become precious beyond words.
What was important to me became crystal clear. It became much easier for me to say “no” to any task or person that didn’t align with my personal values and priorities. It also became easier to say “yes” to my immediate family and spiritual life.
I also realized that I couldn't keep worrying about all the people that had an issue with my success. When a person showed they were motivated more by jealousy than anything else I quickly eliminated them from my mental rolodex. In the past I would have tried to bring them along, make them feel comfortable with my success -- that had to end. I don't have the time for fragile egos, and I recommend that as advice to anyone: notice who is truly supportive of your efforts, and who seems to constantly bring you down. Then cut the dead weight!
Patty with family and sister
What did you learn about the life surrounding you?
Life happens. Bad things happen to good people. It is important to give yourself time to grieve and heal. It is also important to surround yourself with people who will tell you when you are not doing enough of that or perhaps have crossed over into "wallowing" -- that honesty is invaluable.
I also learned that gratitude is key. I learned to truly be grateful the people around you who are loyal and loving. I try to take time each week to offer gratitude in my heart for those who show up in my life in beautiful supportive ways. I also make a point of telling them.
Patty with her husband and children
How did these realizations affect your business?
My business (Mom Gets a Life) was affected on many levels. In order to be with my mother fully I handed much more of my business off to my support team – VA, administrator, copywriter and graphic designer. It was amazing to see how much of my business that I thought I had to do myself could be handed off to others when it became essential that I have every moment possible available.
I now allow much of the “work” in my business to stay with my support team so I can put my energy to the parts of the business I enjoy most – speaking and working with clients. My income has grown accordingly!
I also noticed that the structure of what I sold and how I sold it changed. I became passionate about growing and shifting my business so that I had more income and more free time – to give me the flexibility to be present for my children and husband… and to keep myself and my spirit whole in the process.
If you could give your teenage self some advice, what would it be?
For God’s sake stop looking for everyone’s approval! You are a kick a** soon-to-be woman – own that!
What advice do you want to offer the Savor community?
Take risks. Invest in your business. Believe in yourself and the passion you bring to your business. Understand that loss is a part of life (and business) and if you live your life to avoid loss, you’ve stopped living. Love with abandon.